Check out Greg in a city near you:
The Atlanta Punchline – Thursday, August 12th through Saturday, August 14th
St Louis Funnybone – Thursday, August 19th through Saturday, August 21st
Greg goes to the dark side to interview the top Adult stars in the business and Mary Jo Buttafuco.The girls give Greg advice on marriage and Greg gives the girls financial advice on mortgages and investments.
Getting It Through My Thick Skull
Misty Stone, Jenna Haze, Belladonna, Joanna Angel, Bobbi Star, Sara Sloan
Greg goes to the dark side to interview the top Adult stars in the business and Mary Jo Buttafuco.The girls give Greg advice on marriage and Greg gives the girls financial advice on mortgages and investments.
Getting It Through My Thick Skull
Misty Stone, Jenna Haze, Belladonna, Joanna Angel, Bobbi Star, Sara Sloan
Greg has guest Rick Shapiro in to do this podcast. Rick is a actor you may recognize from the HBO show Lucky Louie, and a comedian that helped shape Greg in his early comedy days with his brutally honest standup.
Greg starts off the podcast with a quick recap of the SiriusXM show that they just did on the Stern channel. Then he gets back into it with the guest. They cover topics like Rick living on the street, what his appearance on Stern was like, and what has happened in Rick’s life lately. They also play some games, Greg asks Rick about pop culture, which Rick only knows about from third hand material, such as comedians he doesn’t respect, and they play Liar’s Poker with Intern Brian Meyer.
Also, throughout this podcast Rick and Greg talk very, very forthrightly about comedians they respect quite a bit, and which ones they don’t so much.
Cioffi’s podcast that he plugged
Greg and Mike Gibbons reconnect on this weeks marvelous podcast. Greg and Gibbons remember the times when they played who can steal the funniest thing from 7/11, Greg can’t help thinking of white supremacist strippers when watching Sandra Bullock in The Blind Side, and Greg tests Producer Mike Cioffi’s podcast hosting skills. The guys take your twitter questions as well as you have overheard, Greg recalls seducing a young door to door magazine saleswoman at his mother’s house, pretending it was his.
Greg has the infamous Andy Dick, who’s been in the news lately for a few incidents, do the podcast from his home!
Greg and Andy note very early that they have to dance around some of the news surrounding Andy’s pending litigation, so they jump right into masturbation talk. Is Greg too harsh? Marc Maron might be upset with Greg, and Andy asked him before they started recording to be cool, but Greg says it’s just him worrying about things being exciting enough. They go through the steps Andy took to get back in the news recently, take your Twitter questions, explain why and HOW Andy Dick lives in a SHED next to a house he paid for, and cap it off with some glory hole talk.
Enjoy.
Coming on Greg Fitzsimmons Show and Fitzdog Radio this week is Pearl! Check them out on Jimmy Kimmel Live! Be sure to send in your twitter questions for Greg, Pearl Aday, and Scott Ian NOW … just @ reply to @gregfitzshow
PEARL TOUR DATES
April 17 Las Vegas, NV @ Cheyenne Saloon
April 18 Aspen, CO @ Belly Up
April 20 Kansas City, MO @ Aftershock
April 22 Minneapolis, MN @ The Rock
April 23 Appleton, WI @ Revolution
April 24 Rockford, IL @ Kryptonite Bar
April 26 Chicago, IL @ Double Door
April 28 New York, NY @ The Studio at Webster Hall
April 29th New Jersey @ Brighton Bar
May 1 Kingston, NY @ The Basement
May 2 Harrisburg, PA @ Dragonfly
May 5 Tulsa, OK @ The Otherside
May 7 Tempe, AZ @ Club House
Greg does the podcast in Florida while attempting to both vacation AND write the book he owes his publisher. He brought his family out to his mom’s place, and has plenty to say about the entire ordeal that has become his trip so far, while talking about the enjoying the holiday and his birthday. He takes the time to play one of the trademark FitzDog games, Rank ‘Em, which he plays by himself.
We’ll be back in the studio doing the LIVE show on Stern 101, as the well as the podcast, next week, be sure to tune in!
5 point method for handling hecklers
1. Square off your feet. Take one step towards them, and repeat whatever it is they just said. This will ensure that everyone in the crowd is aware of what is going on and it buys you an extra 5 seconds to size them up.
2. Size them up. Look for any birth defects, ethnic impurities, sexual deviations, like homosexuality or in a perfect world, they are the 3rd or 5th wheel at their table). Like Wild Kingdom, or Keeping Up With The Kardashians, a predator must separate and destroy the weak.
3. Destroy the weak. Kill them with kindness. You have already established that there is a douche bag iin the house, now you have to establish that you as the comedian are a good and decent person. This will enable you to push the heckler towards suicide following the performance. Say something nice about the heckler with as little irony and sarcasm as possible. This will throw him/(drunken) her off balance.
4. Pushing the heckler over the edge. Take the spark of pity that you have created from step 3, and douse it with one gallon barrel high octane comedic cruelty. The table has been set and now it’s time for the heckler to eat a basket of deep-fried shit (which will count as part of his two drink minimum). He will want very badly to walk out the door at this point.
5. Kicking him out the door. Don’t stop. You are not only policing this situation but sending a message to any other potential hecklers in the crowd. Pile on and then pile on a little bit more. And then a lot more. It may feel wrong, but let’s face it, but let’s face it, you are telling dick jokes to drunks in a mini-mall, not lecturing on public safety to a middle school.
The crowd has two choices at this point, the Philadelphia Flyers “Nananana.. hey, hey, hey, hey… good-bye” song or feeling sorry for the heckler and turning on you. The latter is preferred (latter means second, by the way). Now you have license to ejaculate all childhood rage in the faces of these ungrateful laid off factory workers, calling themselves a crowd. I once experienced this an hour and 10 minutes into a set in Minneapolis. I informed the crowd that because of their failure, I would be walking all 300 people from the room. For the next 45 minutes, I assaulted them with AIDS jokes, 911 jokes and Viking jokes, while counting the numbers down as people paid their checks and left. When I hit 200, I congratulated the survivors and did 10 classic minutes from the Fitz of Laughter album, available if you email your receipt for my book, Dear Mrs. Fitzsimmons to Alice at fitzdogradio@gmail.com
Greg invites Simpson’s Co-Creator Sam Simon and comedian Leslie “Big Les” Jones to the Fitzdog man cave for this weeks intense podcast. The group agrees on intern Brian’s low sexual potential, they chat about last weekend’s Academy Awards, and Leslie searches for a man to tell her to shut up. Greg describes to Leslie what could have been between them if he weren’t married, they take your twitter questions, and Greg aces his sponsor plugs.
